Revenge of the Chip/Transcript

Television Host: Ha ha ha! So you bit the sandwich and then saw half a worm in the part you hadn't eaten! Right?

Kid: Uh huh.

Television Host: Ha ha! And then what did you do?

Buster Baxter, Francine Frensky, Arthur Read: SPIT IT OUT!

Buster: Go to the emergency room!

Francine: Ew! Get dewormed!

Kid: Ate the rest.

(Laughter)

Arthur, Buster, and Francine: Ugh! That's gross!

Television Host: (laughs again) Boys sure do the most embarrassing things, don't they? Let's watch a reenactment.

Arthur: (to the audience watching his show) It's weird how we all hate being embarrassed, but it doesn't bug us much if it happens to someone else. Sort of.

Francine: If I were him, I'd wear a bag over my head for the rest of my life.

Arthur: How can you tell everybody he did that? On TV?

Buster: I wonder what kind of sandwich it was.

(the kids see a close-up of the sandwich with a worm inside it on the screen)

Francine: TURN IT OFF!

(all talking at once)

Buster: But there's still ten more embarrassing minutes to come.

(Intertitle)

REVENGE OF THE CHIP

Written by: Dietrich Smith ---- Storyboard by: Mario Cabrera

Francine: (voice-over) Revenge of the Chip!

D.W.: Arthur!

Arthur: (to the audience) SHHH!

(Back to the story)

Arthur: So You Do the Most Embarrassing Things is going to do a live show at Wonderworld next week, and we wrote in for tickets.

#

The Reads are sitting at the table. Mr. Read is serving sandwiches.

Arthur: So, “You Do The Most Embarrassing Things” is gonna do a live show at Wonderworld next week, and we wrote in for tickets.

D.W.: Oh boy, can I come? I've never seen TV before it's TV before.

Arthur: Come on, D.W.! Every time I take you to something, you act like such a little kid! He checks the inside of his sandwich. And it's so embarrassing!

D.W.: Uh-uh. Name just one time.

Arthur: Hm. Flashback: Arthur and D.W. are watching a science fiction movie. While everybody looks intently at the screen, D.W. eats and drinks noisily. Shh! D.W., just watch the movie! A tall moose is sitting in the seat in front of D.W.

D.W.: Hm. She climbs over the seats, almost knocking Arthur's glasses off.

Arthur: Hey! D.W.! No!

D.W.: Ah! Arthur catches her as she falls. Her popcorn lands on Mr. Haney's head.

Mr. Haney: Oh!

Arthur: Er... Sorry, sir. The flashback ends.

D.W.: That was last winter! I was only a little kid! Name something that happened not so long ago!

Arthur: You thought you were gonna die from eating a green potato chip.

Mr.+Mrs. Read: (giggle)

D.W.: You promised you wouldn't talk about that any more!

Mr. Read: (surpressing a laugh:) Arthur, don't tease DW.

D.W.: I don't do embarrassing kid's stuff any more. If I prove that I'm more grown-up now, I can go, right?

Arthur: Yeah, sure. But I know there is no way you can prove that.

D.W.: Just watch me.

#

Arthur enters the library. D.W. follows pulling a squeaky handcart. The noise makes everyone look.

Arthur: Well, D.W., you're failing so far.

D.W.: That's what you think. She looks at the books in a shelf. Thin, kinda fat, very thin, medium... She sees a huge volume. Wow! That's definitely not for little kids!

#

Arthur and D.W. walk out the library. D.W. has the big book in her handcart.

Arthur: Getting that book doesn't prove you're grown-up. You can't read it.

D.W.: Mom and Dad can read it to me for a bedtime story. I'm interested in the subject. What is it again?

Arthur: (sighs) “Macro Economics.“

D.W.: I love that. What is it again?

#

Arthur and Buster watch TV.

TV announcer: „The Bionic Bunny Show!“

Behind them on the floor lies a tin can phone. D.W. sits on her bed with the other can.

D.W.: Hm. Suspicious. They're using the TV to drown our their voices.

Buster: (through the phone:) Hello, D.W.

Arthur: Hh! Very suspicious!

#

Arthur and Buster play with action figures in the yard. D.W. watches them from under a mildly camouflaged green blanket.

Arthur+Buster: (make airplane noises) Buster suddenly looks through the hole in the blanket.

Buster: Hello, D.W.

D.W.: Arg! She falls backwards. Very very suspicious.

#

Arthur and Buster are reading comics on Arthur's bed. D.W. watches them from the treehouse through Bionic Bunny binoculars.

D.W.: Very very very suspicious. They're keeping their faces turnes away so I can't read their lips. Oh wait! Here comes! The boys turn around.

Buster: (moving lips slowly:) Hel-lo Dee-dubbel-you.

D.W.: I need more sophisticateted equipment.

#

D.W. in her pyjamas phones the operator.

D.W.: I need the number of the nearest lie detector store. Arthur calls from the kitchen. He's holding a newspaper.

Arthur: Hey, D.W.! You're famous! Look, you're in Buster's mom's "Let A Smile Be Your Umbrella" column.

D.W. takes the paper.

D.W.: I can't read. What's it say? Arthur snatches the paper back.

Arthur: "A story that's put a smile on my face for the past few days involves a little girl who thought that green potato chips were fatal. Five-year-old Dora Winifred Read eagerly gobbled up a chip one afternoon, only to be informed by her practical joker brother Arthur that green chips were deadly.“

D.W. sees herself as an adult giving a press conference in the Oval Office. Francine is one of the reporters.

Francine: President D.W., in your past term, you ended poverty and war and outlawed older brothers who break their promises.

Reporters: (Hooray!)

Francine: But, Mrs. President , I have one question. She holds up a bag. Would you like a potato chip? I checked for green ones!

Reporters: (laugh) The fantasy ends.

D.W.: You've got to help me stop this or I'll never live it down!

Arthur: D.W., I have things to do. A thought bubble appears in which a crying D.W. runs rings around Arthur. (in bubble:) I won't help you! Another bubble appears in which D.W. is quiet and smiling. (in bubble:) Okay, I'll help you. The bubbles disappear. Okay, D.W., I'll help you.

#

Arthur and D.W. return home.

D.W.: It's hopeless! I can never show my face again. And you won't even admit you did it. She puts on a football helmet. It's just like the times you stole my “Crazy Bus”-CD and my snowball.

Arthur: You know Mom and Dad took that CD.

D.W.: So you finally admit you took my snowball!