Meet Binky/Transcript

Introduction

Arthur is standing in a street in front of the Read house.

Arthur: If there's one thing everyone's talking about, it's Binky.

Binky: Hi!

Arthur: Not that Binky. This Binky.

He holds up a CD.

Radio DJ Dr. Jake is listening to Binky’s song in his studio.

Arthur: Their song went straight to number one in two hours!

Dr. Jake: For the forty-seventh time today...Binky! And in the “Whatever happened to...?” category: "Crazy Bus".

He throws the Crazy Bus CD in the trash.

Kids are buying Binky CDs. A shop assistant puts a Crazy Bus model in the trash, then puts Binky CDs in its place. Kids take them away immediately.

Arthur sits on the curb.

Arthur: We can't get enough of Binky.

Binky dances behind him.

Arthur: No, not that Binky!

Kids are running into a Binky store.

Arthur: There's all the Binky stuff: Binky shirts, Francine. Binky hats, Fern. not to mention the very popular Binky breadmaker.

Buster eats a slice of bread and hugs the machine.

Buster: Mmm, Binky bread!

Dr. Jake: And going on sale tomorrow, Binky tickets for a Binky concert!

Buster, Arthur, Fern and Francine high-five one another.

Kids: Binky in concert? Yeah!

Title Card: Francine Hits Gong

A music journalist sits in Svern Smith’s office.

Journalist: We're here with Binky's manager - Svern Smith! Svern, do you think there are many Binky products?

Svern: The group is very concerned their name not be overused. They worry about it a lot.

An assistant brings in a Binky wheelbarrow.

Svern: I want 200,000 in stores tomorrow.

Journalist: So far, Binky have been mysterious figures who've never given a concert or even been interviewed.

Svern: That will all change at the big show when we make a very special announcement. But you have to be there to hear it, so get your tickets now! Now! [howls] NOW! [calmly] Please.

***

Outside a concert hall, a mother and her daughter set up a couch while Slink holds a TV set.

PA System: Tickets for Binky will go on sale in six hours.

The mother blows up the couch and they sit down in front of the TV. A man sets up a tent around himself. Behind him, there is a long queue.

***

Mrs. Frensky, Francine, Buster and Prunella are standing in line for Binky tickets.

Mrs. Frensky: We're pretty far down. I hope we get tickets.

Francine: We have to get tickets. Otherwise we won't hear the big announcement.

Prunella is looking at an astrology chart.

Prunella: My sister Rubella cast astrological charts for the group, auditorium and each of us.

Buster: Why?

Prunella: To know where to sit. We must be in a row divisible by four and avoid seats ending in K, O or LL.

Francine: Where's Arthur? He said his mom was gonna drop him off here.

***

Meanwhile, D.W. sits with her mom in a shoe store looking at two different shoes she is trying on.

D.W.: Hmm. The purple patent leather high tops or the cherry checked moccasins?

Arthur is sitting next to them.

Arthur: Aww...

***

Later, Mrs. Frensky and the kids have advanced almost to the concert hall.

Francine: Where is Arthur? He's never gonna get tickets at this rate.

Buster: How can he be late? This is one of the most important events of this or any other century.

Prunella: Arthur has Neptune in Capricorn. Hm. He's doomed Binky-wise.

***

Mrs. Read, Arthur and D.W. drive along the line of waiting people. D.W. admires her new shoes.

Arthur: There's a line. I knew it! They reach the end of the line, which is outside of the city. Aww!

A cow looks into the car window and moos.

***

Later, Arthur, Buster and Francine are sitting in the Sugar Bowl.

Buster: Our seats are in row 42A. Where are yours?

Arthur: 739XXX.

Buster: Do you want a pair of binoculars?

***

Arthur, Buster and Francine walk through a department store. Binky music plays and there is a life-size cardboard printout of the band.

Buster: Wow, look! Wouldn't it be great to meet Binky?

Arthur: We’re just kids. No one famous would talk to us.

Buster: No, but they'd talk to our parents. And we'd be right there.

He imagines the Binky musicians sitting on the Baxters' couch while Mrs. Baxter sits on a chair with a notepad. Buster takes a photo and the musicians smile.

The fantasy ends. Buster smiles dreamily.

Buster: Binky interview.

Arthur looks at Francine who smiles just as dreamily. In her imagination, Kyra comes running out of the concert hall where the other band members wait.

Kyra: My priceless sapphire necklace! How could I let it fall in the trash?!

A car horn is heard.

Inga: Do you hear something?

Mr. Frensky stops his garbage truck in front of the hall. Francine rides on the platform in the back holding the necklace.

Francine: Found it!

Kyra hugs her.

The fantasy ends.

Francine: Binky garbage!

In Arthur’s imagination, Mrs. Read sits at her computer

Mrs. Read: Looks like you owe an additional billion dollars.

The band walks out of the room looking horrified.

Band: (Aw! A billion dollars!)

Bjorn: We'll never be able to pay it all!

Arthur: What about my autograph?

The fantasy ends.

Arthur: Binky taxes? Yuck!

Francine: Let's go talk to our parents, quick!

Francine and Buster run off.

Arthur: My seats are terrible, my friends will all meet Binky, and then Mom will scare them back to Finland!

He walks away.

***

Arthur, Buster and Francine prepare for playing street hockey in front of the Read house. All are wearing Binky shirts and helmets.

Arthur: So when do you meet Binky?

Buster: My mom said Binky's not hard news. Whatever that means.

Francine: My dad just laughed. Face it - we won't meet them.

Buster: Sometimes bands pull fans from the audience to dance with them.

Arthur: Really?

Francine: They can't pick you, Arthur. By the time you get to the stage the concert would be over!

Arthur imagines sitting behind the last row during the Binky concert with a large telescope. The music journalist approaches him.

Journalist: We're here with Arthur Read who has the worst seat for any concert ever! Wait! I've just been told you were chosen to dance with Binky! Go on down!

Arthur starts running down the aisle.

Arthur: (pants)

He keeps on running. The rows of seats are now empty. When he climbs on stage it is empty, except for Buster, who looks older than usual.

Arthur: Where's Binky?

Arthur: The concert ended three years ago, Arthur. We're in the sixth grade now. Don't worry. We saved all your homework assignments.

Francine brings a wheelbarrow full of books.

***

Later, Arthur sits in his room doing homework and looking sad.

Mr. Read: Wanna help me with a job tomorrow night?

Arthur: What about the concert? We have to get to the concert early. Who knows how long it'll take to get to row 739XXX.

Mr. Read: Ah, this won't take long. I'm catering dinner for the crew working some concert. Hey, wait. It's at the civic auditorium, too.

Arthur: The Binky concert? You're feeding Binky?!

Mr. Read: We'll be backstage. I told their manager my son was a big fan and he said you could be the first kid to see Binky up close.

Arthur looks delighted. Stars appear in his glasses and fireworks go off behind him.

Arthur: I'm going to meet Binky!

He imagines Svern introducing him to the band while journalists take pictures.

Svern: This is Arthur Read. The very special first boy to meet Binky!

Arthur: (shyly:) Hi.

Inga: Well, we can tell you're the most interesting of our fans, Arthur.

Kyra: Come with us!

They get into a limousine. The musicians sing while Arthur eats cookies. Svern is at the wheel.

Svern: (gasps)

He faints and falls on the car horn.

Arthur: Oh, no, he fainted!

Kyra: Augh!

Nero: We're going to crash!

Bjorn: We're out of control!

Arthur: I'll save you!

Band: (scream)

Arthur ties a rope to a French horn and throws it around a tree like a grappling hook. The limousine stops right in front of a gorge.

Bjorn: Arthur. You saved our lives.

Nero: You're like the brother we never had.

Kyra: Come luge with us!

Arthur and the band ride a sled through a snowy land.

All: (cheer)

The fantasy ends.

Mr. Read: You can bring your friends, too. I'm sure they’d like to meet Binky.

Arthur: Really? Dad, that's great! Wait until I tell them!

He is about to run downstairs, but stops. He imagines Svern introducing him, Buster, Francine and Prunella to the band.

Svern: Yes, a bunch of kids.

Inga: We'd invite you along, but there's so many of you, you wouldn't all fit in our limo.

The band gets into the limousine. Svern throws the kids some bags.

Svern: Here's some Binky frozen vegetables!

Francine and Prunella look disgusted.

Buster: Mmm. Turnips!

The limousine drives off.

Arthur: Wait, what about luge?!

The fantasy ends.

Arthur: You know, I think everyone may be busy before the concert, and, er, Francine is allergic to... curtains.

Mr. Read looks surprised.

***

Arthur and Buster meet in front of the school.

Buster: One more day till the concert! I'm still trying to get my mom to interview Binky. If she does, I'll bring you. Friends have to stick together.

Arthur looks guilty.

Arthur: Oh, thanks, Buster.

***

Binky meets Arthur at his locker.

Binky: Hey! The radio station sent me tickets to make up for getting me in trouble. Since your seats are rotten, you can sit with my mom and me.

Arthur: Really? Gee, thanks, Binky.

Binky: I know you'd do the same.

Arthur: Uh... you know, Binky, what if you could meet...?

He imagines Svern introducing Binky the boy to Binky the band.

Svern: Binky, Binky. Binky, Binky. Oh, and the kid with glasses.

Inga: Your name is Binky? Come with us!

Binky squeezes into the limousine with the musicians.

Binky: Move over, please.

Band: (groan)

Binky: Sorry. No more room!

Kyra: How do you feel about luge?

The limousine drives off.

Arthur: Aww...

The fantasy ends. Arthur closes his locker.

Arthur: I've gotta go. See ya!

He runs off.

***

Arthur prepares food with his dad and drops an olive for Pal.

***

Arthur and his dad bring food into the concert hall where roadies are setting up the stage.

After setting up the buffet, Mr. Read gives Arthur some used foil.

Mr. Read: Can you throw these away for me?

Arthur throws the foil into what seems to be a metal trash can. Two roadies walk past him.

Arthur: Hi.

They ignore him. When Arthur gets back, Svern and another man have started eating.

Mr. Read: Arthur, this is Winston and Svern. Arthur's very excited about seeing the group up close.

Svern: Great! We'll have them set up in 15 minutes.

The men leave.

***

Shortly afterwards, Arthur looks through the curtain into the packed auditorium. Mrs. Frensky, Francine, Buster, Prunella, Binky and Mrs. Barnes sit close to each other.

Buster: (makes weird face)

Prunella: (gasps)

She tries to get her crystal ball back from Binky.

Arthur: (sighs)

Arthur sits down on a couch looking sad.

Mr. Read: What's wrong, Arthur?

Arthur: This would be more fun if my friends were here.

Mr. Read: But you'll be meeting Binky soon.

Arthur: That would be more fun with them, too.

***

In the auditorium, Buster looks around.

Buster: I don't see Arthur anywhere.

Arthur: Here I am! My dad's working backstage, so we can all meet Binky.

Kids: Yeah!

***

Mr. Read, Arthur, Buster, Prunella, Francine and Binky enter a room backstage.

Svern: Binky is ready!

He pulls a lever. The four musicians stand frozen.

Children: Wow! Binky!

Arthur: I'm Arthur Read and these are my friends! We’re very excited to meet you.

He tries to shake Kyra’s hand. She does not move and when Arthur touches her hand, there are electric sparks.

Children: Whoa!

Svern: It's okay. You see, Binky isn't real. That's our big announcement. They're holograms.

The kids look dumbfounded.

Svern: I create the image on my Troglibyte 2000.

Winston stands by a large computer.

Winston: And I feed the voices of the world's greatest singers into my creation: the most advanced music synthesizer known to man!

He pulls up the same metal can into which Arthur threw the plastic foil. Arthur looks worried as Winston plugs a cable into the can.

Winston: We combine the music and images and,... voilà! Binky!

Svern pushes a button. The holograms move and play. Suddenly, Inga gets stuck tapping the piano keys while Kyra’s upper body rotates. The music goes haywire.

Svern: (surprised) Huh?

Winston opens the synthenizer can and finds Arthur's trash inside. The music starts winding down.

Arthur: I thought it was a trash can. Sorry.

Winston removes the trash.

Winston: Phew! As long as it wasn't an I/O operator, or an angry garden salad.

Arthur: Actually, it was a banana.

***

A while later, the kids sit in the auditorium.

Buster: Binky sure wasn't what I expected.

Arthur: I think I'd rather have real friends than a see-through group.

Francine: Sometimes it's just better not to know anything about celebrities.

Svern: Here they are... Binky

The band appears on stage and start to play.