Francine's Pilfered Paper/Transcript

(The schoolbell rings in a seventeenth century American village and all the 3rd graders run to school.)

Arthur Read: Thou hadst better hasten thyself, good Master Buster. Schoolmaster Ratburn will be most irate if thou art tardy.

Brain: He will punish thee roundly.

Buster Baxter: In a moment, good neighbor Arthur. I canst but help look upon yon poor girl.

(He points at something as Brain leads him away.)

Brain: Nay, good Master Buster. Look not upon the wretched thief lest it ruin the taste of tomorrow's Thanksgiving feast.

Buster: Willst there be turkey, good Master Brain?

Brain: Aye, and onion garlic stew.

Buster: I couldst live without the stew, but the thought of turkey brightens my soul.

Muffy Crosswire: 'Tis most sad that our dear friend will languish in yonder stockade while we sup. Couldst we not bring her a crust of bread?

(Mr. Ratburn stands before them.)

Nigel Ratburn: Nay, good children. She hath committed the most egregious crime known to student and schoolmaster alike. She must contemplate the error of her ways.

(He points at Francine who is in the stocks while has a red “P” on her cap.)

Francine: But I didn't even know it was wrong! I'll never do it again! Let me out! Let me out!

(Pal, wearing a pilgrim’s hat, collar and shoes licks her face.)

Francine: Eurgh!

Writer: Raye Lankford

Storyboard Artists: Jean Lacombe, Ivan Tankushev, and Robert Yap

Binky Barnes: (voice-over) Francine's Pilfered Paper.

Arthur: (yelping)

(Mr. Ratburn’s class is decorated for Thanksgiving.)

Mr. Ratburn: Because it's Thanksgiving this Thursday, I have a surprise for you all.

Arthur: No homework?

Binky: Football?

Buster: Pumpkin pie?

Mr. Ratburn: Nope, a five-page report due Monday, one week from today.

Class: Oh!

Brain: Yay!

Arthur: That's a terrible surprise.

Mr. Ratburn: On the contrary. I think it will help you appreciate the many facets of this historical holiday. (He starts handing out pieces of paper.) I have selected a unique topic for each of you to explore that I trust you will find most illuminating.

Muffy: Pilgrim fashion? What fashion?! They always wore black.

Brain: “Why do we celebrate Thanksgiving on the same day every year”? Oh! I was hoping for the socio-political repercussions of the Arminius-Gomarus conflict.

Binky: It's your lucky day. I'll trade you.

Francine: Pilgrim cuisine? Great! Five pages about yams. I'm doomed!

(Buster and Brain walk through the library.)

Buster: Five pages. How will I ever write five pages? This must be what college is like, except we still have to be in bed by nine and can't drive. Oh!

(They bump into Francine who is carrying a pile of books and made her drop them.)

Brain: Sorry, Francine. Wow, you have more books than even I take out.

Buster: Are you starting your own library?

Francine: They're for the Thanksgiving report. I couldn't find any one book that had all the information I need. (Arthur and Buster help her pick up the books.) I think I strained my back. I probably won't be able to play basketball all season!

Brain: I've got a better idea. Come on!

(Brain sits at a library computer while Buster and Francine stand next to him)

Brain: You can probably get most of the information you need off the internet by using a search engine. Just type in what you're looking for. "Pilgrim's diet". Then hit "Search". You'll get more specific results if you put quotation marks around your search topic. Here's a list of some links that might be helpful. (Francine gets the printed list.) Be careful, though. Some stuff on the internet is inaccurate, so it's best to check your facts with other sources.

Francine: Thanks!

Man: BEHOLD!! The real truth! Francine Frensky... Is a plagiarist!

Francine: No! Please! I didn't know it was wrong! I swear, I didn't know!