Fernfern and the Secret of Moose Mountain/Transcript

Doria Walters: Lights out, Fern.

Fern Walters: I'm in the middle of Zutzut and the Temple of the Condor.

Doria: You need your sleep, sweetie. Tomorrow you're climbing a mountain just like Zutzut.

Fern: You're right. Tomorrow, it's gonna be my adventure. Fernfern and the Secret of Moose Mountain.

(Title Card)

FERNFERN AND THE SECRET OF MOOSE MOUNTAIN

Written by: Stephanie Simpson --- Storyboard by: Ivan Tankushev

Binky Barnes: (voice-over) Fernfern and the Secret of Moose Mountain.

(Back to the story)

#

At the Moose Mountain gift shop.

Muffy: I think it’s time for you to expand your retail horizons. You should carry one of these. It’s a global positioning system, the latest in navigation technology. I got it at the Sherpa Image. Our position is thirty-nine steps, forty degrees North by Northwest from our minivan. Whatever. Now I’ll ask it to give me the location of the nearest mall.    The GPS beeps.   Twenty-seven miles away?? We’ve fallen off the face of the earth.

Fern: I have a question. What can you tell me about the dark side of the mountain?

Ranger Jackie: What?

Fern: You know, a little history, something like an abandoned goldmine haunted by the wails of those who died there driven mad by their greedy obsessions. Or maybe a ravine with the remains of a wagon that plunged over the side, the bones and dreams of the pioneers crushed and shattered on the pitiless rocks below. Or how about a desolate campsite where explorers shared their last rations before disappearing forever into the harsh and silent wilderness.

Ranger Jackie: Mercy, no!

#

Fern has a fantasy with herself as Zutzut (Tintin) and Francine as Captain Haddock.

Francine: Move it, Fernfern, you sloth-footed slowpoke!

Fern: Commander, may I remind you one wrong move could trigger a rockslide.

Francine: Plotting, perambulating pedestrian!

#

Francine and Fern reach a rope bridge.

Fern: A rope bridge! Zutzut crossed one of these in "The Pearl Palace".

Francine: Come on, then.

Fern: Um... Francine, I have to go to the bathroom.

Francine: Aw. Fine! Go into the bushes over there and make it quick!

Fern: No way! I'm going back to the rest area.

Francine: You're on your own then. I'm fifteen minutes ahead of schedule and I'm not going back. She steps onto the bridge.

Mr. Frensky and Muffy are a little bit behind. Muffy is talking on her cell phone.

Muffy: Can you still hear me, Daddy? Great! How about now? Great! And now? They reach Fern.

Mr. Frensky: Hey, roadrunners! Everything okay?

Francine: Fern has to go to the bathroom. Indoors!

Mr. Frensky: Okay. Well, we're not that far from the rest area. You two can go back and we'll all wait for you here. The other girls are catching up.

Francine: She can go by herself!

Mr. Frensky: That's not how it works. Fern is your buddy.

Fern: Either way, I really need to go. Now!

Mr. Frensky: Francine Alice Frensky! Francine comes back.

#

After taking a shortcut, Francine is unsure about the way.

Fern: Francine, make up your mind.

Francine: Quiet! I’m thinking.

Fern: Are we lost?

Francine: No, I’m just not exactly sure where we are.

Fern: Yay, we’re lost! Now we can have a real adventure!

#

Francine has pulled Fern out of a swamp.

Francine: Whatever happens, we have to stick together.

Fern: I guess I’m no Zutzut.

Francine: No, but you’re pretty good at figuring things out when you’re just being Fern.

#

The girls see a hawk circling over them.

Fern: It’s a vulture! We must have “Early Bird Special” written all over us!