Arthur the Wrecker/Transcript

Introduction

Arthur stands in the yard holding a baseball bat.

Arthur: If you examined history, I bet you'd find kids like me did important things.

Mr. and Mrs. Read, wearing ancient Egyptian dress, walk up to Arthur and Pal, who are standing in front of the Sphinx. Arthur is holding a baseball bat and ball.

Mr. Read: Tut, Tut, I asked you not to play too close to our new sphinx.

Arthur: I'll be careful, Papa Pharaoh. He hits the ball against the sphinx's nose which breaks off. Heh heh... Oops!

Arthur (narrator): There were kids like me in Ancient Greece too.

In an ancient Greek town, Mr. Haney and Mr. Read stand next to the Venus de Milo, which is holding D.W.

Mr. Haney: No, sorry. I don't like it.

A thrown discus knocks off the statue's arms, along with D.W. Arthur comes running.

Mr. Read: Arthureus, I asked you not to play with your discus in my work area!

Arthur: I'm sorry, Fathereus.

Mr. Haney: It's beautiful! I'll take it.

He takes out some gold coins.

Arthur (narrator): I bet there were even kids like me around in colonial days.

Arthur flies a kite in 18^th century Philadelphia. He runs into the Liberty Bell.

Arthur: Aah!

The bell starts to crack. Arthur runs away.

The flashbacks end. D.W. appears beside Arthur in the front door. A window in the door is broken.

Arthur: All those things became more valuable and important because of an innocent kid. So you see, D.W., one day this may be looked back on as an historic event.

D.W.: I bet you'll never forget it. Mooom! Arthur broke the window!

Title Card: Arthur With Umbrella

Mrs. Read returns from a walk with Kate and D.W. D.W. is on roller skates and keeps falling down.

D.W.: When we get home... ow... will you play kitchen with me? Ow!

Mrs. Read: What's kitchen?

D.W. holds on to a tree.

D.W.: That's the game where I bring you ingredients and you make cookies. Then I eat them.

Mrs. Read: I see. I'm afraid I have to work.

Arthur comes running.

Arthur: Mom, the Brain loaned me the computer game Deep Dark Sea. Can I play it on your computer?

Mrs. Read: Sure, after dinner.

They go inside. Arthur and D.W. try to walk through the door at the same time.

Arthur+D.W.: Oof!

Arthur: After dinner? Why not now?

Mrs. Read: I have to work. It's tax season.

***

The Read family has dinner. Kate rubs food in her face.

Kate: (coos)

Arthur: So, Mom, can I play on your computer now?

Mrs. Read: Yup, after you finish eating.

She hands him mashed potatoes. Arthur eats hurriedly.

Arthur: (wolfs down food) Done!

He runs to the computer.

Arthur sits at the computer. D.W. looks over his shoulder.

Arthur: Don't distract me, D.W.

D.W.: I won't.

On the screen, a diver, armed with a harpoon, walks over the ocean floor.

D.W.: How do you play it?

Arthur: You search the ocean floor, and there's sharks and sunken stuff.

Computer: “Sonar shows jellyfish coming your way.”

D.W.: How do you win?

Arthur: Kids say there's this thing that you find. Buster says, his cousin's friend's brother found it, and the computer gave him a number to call, and he won a lot of stuff. But he had to swear in blood never to tell what he found.

D.W.: Octopus!

Arthur: No, he didn't win an octopus.

D.W.: No, Arthur! Octopus!

The diver is “killed” by a large octopus.

Arthur: You're distracting me! Go away!

D.W. walks off.

D.W.: Doesn't know what he's looking for!

***

That night, Mrs. and Mr. Read walk to Arthur's room.

D.W.: Good night.

Mrs. Read: Where's Arthur?

Arthur sits in front of the computer with rings under his eyes.

Mr. Read: Arthur, it's late. You don't have to play a hundred games in one night.

Arthur: This is still my first game.

Mrs. Read: Come on. Time for bed.

Arthur: I can't stop now! I just made it to the ancient rotting shipwreck.

Mr. Read: Wouldn't you rather play when you're more awake.

Mrs. Read: But if you make a mistake because you're tired.

Arthur: Then I'd have to start all over. I'd better save the game right now.

Computer: “I'll be awaiting your return to your mission in the deep dark sea.”

Arthur: Huh? He notices that the computer mouse is stuck to his palm. (grunts)

***

Later, Arthur lies in bed and moves his fingers over Pal's head, as if operating a mouse.

Arthur: There it is... the thing.

Pal gets annoyed and pushes his hand away.

***

The next morning at the breakfast table, Arthur moves a stack of pancakes like a mouse.

Arthur: Then I go around the sharks to the sunken hull...

D.W.: What are you doing?

Arthur notices that his fingers are covered in syrup.

Arthur: I was thinking about the game.

He licks his fingers. Buster knocks on the window.

Arthur lets Buster in. They run into the living room.

Buster: Where is it? Are you playing it yet?

Arthur: Not yet. They run past Pal, who follows them. Last night, I got all the way to the sunken hull.

Buster: Wow! What's a sunken hull?

Arthur: A big old haunted ship. I saved the game so we can start from there.

Buster: With a head start like that, maybe we'll find the... thing.

They stop. Pal bumps into Buster's legs.

Arthur: Oh, no!

Mrs. Read is working on the computer.

Mrs. Read: Sorry, boys. I have to work on the computer today.

Arthur: But it's Saturday. It's your day off.

Mrs. Read: I don't get a day off during...

Arthur: Tax season. I know.

***

Mr. Read decorates cakes in his workshop.

Mr. Read: (whistles)

He sees Arthur and Buster sitting outside looking bored.

Arthur: Now there's nothing to do.

D.W. pulls Pal and Kate in a small wagon.

D.W.: (hums)

Mr. Read looks out of the window.

Mr. Read: Why don't you boys ride to the park? It's a beautiful day.

Arthur: Yeah, that sounds fun.

Buster: Yeah, fun.

Mrs. Read comes out.

Mrs. Read: Honey, I have to run to the office.

Arthur: Can we use your computer?

Mrs. Read: I'd rather you didn't. I'll be right back and I'll need it again.

She leaves.

***

Arthur and Buster look at the computer which is turned off.

Buster: Couldn't you just show it to me for one second?

Arthur: I guess. Mom would never even know.

Arthur and Buster start playing. D.W. walks by the door and comes in.

D.W.: Arthur, what are you doing? Mom told you not to play on her computer.

Arthur: We're not playing. I'm just showing it to Buster. Go away.

D.W.: If I go away, I'll probably tell Daddy. Besides, I want to watch.

Arthur: Okay, you can watch. But be quiet.

On the screen, the diver approaches a treasure chest.

Buster: Wow! Even the Brain didn't get this far.

D.W.: What's that?

Arthur: I don't know.

Buster: Go to it! Maybe it's the thing!

D.W.: A treasure chest...

Arthur: I bet that's it. That's...

Arthur+Buster: ...the thing!

Arthur: I think I won! We've got to open it!

Both boys grab the mouse.

Arthur+Buster: (struggle)

Suddenly, keyboard and mouse fall to the floor. The screen briefly shows static before going black.

Arthur+Buster: (gasp)

Arthur stares at the screen. An image of the game briefly appears, then it goes black again.

Buster: You wrecked it.

Arthur: No, I didn't! You knocked the keyboard off the desk!

Buster: Because you pushed my arm. Try turning it off and on again.

Arthur presses a button, but nothing happens.

D.W.: You killed it! Now Mommy will lose her job! Then we'll lose the house and live in the street, and Kate will get ammonia and we'll all starve!

Arthur: D.W., be quiet! I'm thinking.

D.W.: And it's your fault so you'd better fix it! Because I like living here!

Buster shakes the computer.

Arthur: Don't do that! You'll make it worse.

Buster: Maybe you'd better call your Mom.

Arthur: I can't. She said not to play with it and now I wrecked it. I got it! Maybe we can fix it before she gets home.

D.W.: Maybe a rich family would adopt me. I’m cute.

Buster: Who'd know how to fix a computer?

Arthur+Buster: The Brain!

***

Arthur and Buster talk to Mr. Powers, who is fixing his car.

Brain: Sorry, boys, he's not home, but I got a hunch where you might find him.

***

Arthur and Buster search the library. Binky sits at a desk reading a book.

Binky: Huh?

He hides the book behind a comic book.

Arthur: If I were Brain, where would I go?

Buster: Ah. Somewhere brainy.

***

Arthur and Buster walk through the Elwood City Planetarium's presentation room and museum.

***

Arthur and Buster run up to the Elwood City Observatory.

***

Arthur and Buster walk through the park.

Arthur: What other brainy places are there for the Brain to go?

Brain stands by a lake and throws stones into the water.

Brain: Hi.

Arthur: We looked everywhere for you.

Buster: Are you doing a physics experiment?

Brain: No, I'm skipping rocks. It's fun.

Arthur: Wouldn't coming to my house and fixing a computer be more fun?

Arthur and Buster pick Brain up and drag him away.

Brain: Aah! Yeah, sure!

***

At the Read house, Brain looks inside the Reads' computer wearing a headband with little lamps attached.

Brain: You know what the problem is?

Arthur: No.

Brain: Well, neither do I.

Arthur+Buster+D.W.: (gasp)

Arthur: Oh... He falls to the floor. I'm dead. Well, you know, I've always wanted to live in Australia.

D.W.: We're doomed! All my childhood happiness is behind me!

Mrs. Read's car is seen outside.

Buster: Gotta go, Arthur.

Brain: Yeah. Nice knowing you.

They run out and meet Mrs. Read at the door.

Mrs. Read: Hello, boys.

She walks up to Arthur. D.W. runs up the stairs.

Mrs. Read: I won't need my computer till after dinner so you can go ahead and play now.

Arthur: Er...no...no, thanks.

Mrs. Read: Are you sick? You don't look well.

She feels Arthur's forehead.

Arthur: I'm going up to pack... er, do my homework.

***

Arthur paces in his room while Pal watches.

Arthur: If I just tell her, what do you think she'll do to me?

In Pal's imagination, Arthur cowers on all fours while Mrs. Read stands over him with a rolled-up magazine.

Mrs. Read: Bad Arthur, Bad boy!

She leads Arthur outside on a leash and closes the door. Arthur scratches at it.

The fantasy ends.

Mrs. Read: Arthur, dinner's ready!

***

Arthur sits down at the dinner table beside D.W.

D.W.: (quietly:) I hope you enjoy your dinner, Arthur! This may be the last meal we ever eat because of you.

Arthur looks down.

A while later, Arthur plays with his meatballs.

Mr. Read: Arthur, you hardly ate any dinner.

Mrs. Read: Maybe you should go to bed early, honey.

She leaves the room.

Arthur: Don't you want dessert, Mom?

Mrs. Read: No, thank you. I have to work.

Arthur and D.W. run after their mom.

Arthur: Why don't we go have a game of catch?

Mrs. Read: I'd love to, Arthur, when I have less work to do.

She is about to turn on the computer.

Arthur: Mom! When was the last time we rode bikes together?

Mrs. Read: Arthur. After tax season, we'll play, I promise.

Arthur: Mom!

Mrs. Read: Please, I have to work!

Arthur: You can't. I wrecked your computer.

Mrs. Read: How? You didn't play on it, did you?

Arthur: Buster only wanted to see it, and you were gone, and it was just gonna be for a second, and... I'm sorry.

D.W. runs into her mom's arms.

D.W.: I don't want to live in the street, Mommy! Please!

Mrs. Read: Let's see what's wrong. She presses a button and nothing happens. This happens all the time. Did you jiggle the switch?

She reaches behind the computer and it goes on. The screen still shows the game.

D.W.: We're not going to starve!

Mrs. Read: You could have just called me and asked for help instead of worrying.

Arthur: I thought you'd be mad.

Mrs. Read: Not mad. Disappointed. I'm forbidding you from playing on the computer for a week. Fair? Arthur nods. How do you play this game?

***

Later, the Read house is seen from outside.

Arthur: Goodnight, Dad!

Mr. Read: Goodnight, Arthur!

Arthur: Goodnight, Mom! Mom? Mom?

Mrs. Read: Just a minute! I almost had the treasure chest opened. Arr. Those snakes are attacking. I'm surrounded. Get back. Get back.