All the Rage/Transcript

Introduction

Muffy stands in front of a creepy looking castle entrance.

Muffy: Welcome to Muffy's House of Fashion Horrors. Here you will see the most frightening fashions the world has ever seen.

Muffy walks inside with Francine, Arthur and Buster.

Muffy: Behold this gruesome sight! Isn't it horrible?

Behind a metal fence is a lifelike statue of Arthur reading a book.

Arthur: What?! It's what I always wear.

Muffy: Exactly! The drab shirt, the plain jeans, horribly boring. This way please. And now, behold the most fearful fashion faux-pas of the century.

She shows Francine in a polka dot skirt standing next to an iron maiden.

Francine: Okay? What's wrong with that? I wore it for my class photo.

Muffy: That dress looks like it has chicken pox. Brr, the sight of it sends chills up my spine.

Arthur:What's that one over there? That does look scary.

Arthur, Buster and Francine walk to another exhibit.

Muffy: No, er, that's not supposed to be part of the exhibit, don't go there!

She steps in front of the exhibit.

Arthur+Buster+Francine: (laugh)

A statue shows Muffy with an odd scarf, an arm warmer, ankle pockets and a monocle.

Francine: That's the craziest get-up I've ever seen.

Buster: It may not be scary, but it sure is silly.

Muffy: No! It's a mistake! Don't look!

Title Card: Stampede

Muffy lies on her bed and watches journalist Candy Coco and Capri Di Vapida in a gondola in Venice. Capri and her dog Pixel are wearing the same clothes they wore in “Pet Projects”.

Candy Coco (on TV): This is Candy Coco and I'm here in Venice, Italy, with Capri Di Vapida, fashion icon, trendsetter, "It" girl.

Bailey brings in a snack.

Muffy: Isn't Capri di Vapida fantastic, Bailey?

Bailey: If by fantastic you mean bizarre, strange and unreal, then yes, Miss Muffy, I wholeheartedly agree.

Candy Coco (on TV): Tell us, Capri, what's the latest fashion trend?

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Oh, er, huge sunglasses are in fashion. They're warm. That's my latest catchphrase. It means cool. Everyone should say it. The gondola passes El Boomerang which is floating in the canal. Sunglasses are warm. Being cool is warm.

Candy Coco (on TV): Oh, um, what's not warm this season?

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Anything that's, like, not what me and Pixel have been wearing lately, that's not warm.

Pixel (on TV): (barks)

Muffy: Oh, dear!

***

Muffy goes through her closet while Bailey holds her discarded clothes.

Muffy: Plaid, ugh! So last January. Capri wouldn't be caught dead in this. Stripes?! That's last February! And what about these horrible hats? What would Capri think?! What was I thinking?!

She throws two hats looking like faceless ski masks on Bailey's pile.

***

The Crosswire limousine stops in front of Care to Wear.

Inside, she shows her old clothes to Buzz Vallette.

Buzz Vallette: Hey, look at these duds. Terrific. Thanks a lot for the donation, Muffy.

Muffy: What is that?

She looks at a pink skirt on a mannequin.

Buzz Vallette: That's a poodle skirt. You don't see 'em around any more, but in the 1950s all the girls wore them. Nifty, huh?

Muffy: I guess, if you're a dog-lover.

Buzz shows a mannequin wearing brightly-colored socks with individual toes.

Buzz Vallette: Check these out - toe socks. It was a huge fad in the 1970s.

Muffy: What's a fad?

Buzz Vallette: It's an activity or fashion that catches on and becomes hugely popular for a while, then it just... fades away.

Muffy: Who created these fads?

Buzz Vallette: I don't know, but whoever did changed the face of fashion forever.

In her imagination, Muffy sits in a gondola in Venice with a cat on her lap. They are dressed like Capri and Pixel.

Candy Coco: I'm here with Muffy Crosswire who has created fads that never go out of style. So, Muffy, what's the latest?

Muffy: I don't know yet, Candy, but all I have to do is say the word and it will be warm.

Candy Coco: Okay, I'll wear it!

She is wearing a T-shirt saying "word".

Muffy: Warm, Candy, very warm.

Cat: (meows)

The fantasy ends.

Muffy: I gotta go. Thanks, Buzz.

On her way out she passes Sue Ellen.

Sue Ellen: Hey, Muffy, doing some shopping?

Muffy: Here? Ha! These fads are all yesterday's news. I was just dropping off some clothes.

Sue Ellen picks up Muffy's old ski hat.

Sue Ellen: You're not getting rid of this hat, are you? It's beautiful.

Muffy: Sue Ellen, it's O-U-T, out!

Sue Ellen: Well, I like it.

Muffy: Of course you like it.

She walks out. Sue Ellen looks annoyed for a moment, then she tries on the hat and looks at herself in a mirror.

***

Muffy sits at her desk with a notepad, while Bailey stands beside her bed.

Muffy: Okay, my new fashion trend has to be something no one has ever seen before, but once they see, they can't do without it. How about a piece of leather that you wrap around your waist?

She draws a belt and shows it to Bailey.

Bailey: I believe it's called a belt, Miss Muffy.

Muffy: Oh, right. Hm, this is harder than I thought.

Bailey: What about a brightly-colored plastic shoe with holes in the top with a catchy name - Docs, Pocs...?

Muffy: Thanks, Bailey, but that would never work, so let’s leave the ideas to me. (gasps) I've got it!

***

Arthur, Francine and Buster warm up on the soccer field. Mr. Ratburn is coaching.

Mr. Ratburn: Take your places at the starting line for the 100 meters please.

The kids take their places including Binky and Muffy who is wearing pockets around her ankles.

Francine: What are you wearing?

Muffy: They're ankle pouches. I made them myself. They're going to be the next big thing and they're so convenient. If you need some money, y-you just... Woah! Oof!

While standing on one leg and opening a pouch, she falls backwards.

Mr. Ratburn: Go!

The other kids start running. Binky takes some of Muffy’s scattered coins.

Muffy: (sighs) Back to the drawing board.

***

Arthur, Buster and Francine are eating nachos at the Sugar Bowl. Muffy comes in with an odd looking scarf.

Muffy: Hey, everyone. Well, what do you all think of my new scarf? Now, this is going to be big, I guarantee it.

Francine: Why is it so sticky?

Muffy: Because it's the Snack-o-Scarf, a registered trademark of Crosswire Enterprises. It's made from gourmet fruit rolls - wear it to keep warm, then when the weather gets nice, have a bite. She takes a bite. Delicious. They currently come in sassy saffron, classy cranberry and elegant edamame. How many do you want?

Buster: I'll take a classy cranberry. Muffy gives him one and he bites into it. Mmm. That's the best-tasting scarf I've ever owned.

Muffy: How about you two? Soon they'll be selling like hot cakes.

Arthur+Francine: No, thanks.

Sue Ellen comes in wearing the ski hat.

Muffy: What about... (gasps) You're wearing that?! But I told you it's out of style.

Sue Ellen: So? I like the way it looks.

Muffy: Like the way it looks? What does that have to do with fashion?

Francine: You have to admit, Muffy, it's less dangerous than your ankle purses.

Buster: But not as tasty as the Snack-o-Scarf.

Flies are buzzing around the scarf.

Muffy: None of you know anything about what's warm. Shoo! Shoo! You just wait! You'll all be begging to wear the next thing I come up with.

She leaves.

***

Muffy sits at her desk. The walls are covered with her drawings.

Muffy: Aha! Genius.

***

Fern stands in the lunch line when Muffy taps her on the back.

Muffy: You've heard of leggings, well, how about armings? She is wearing thick pink covers on her arms. Fern rolls her eyes and walks away. (sighs) (struggles) She tries to get a tray, but she cannot move her arms properly. (sighs)

Arthur gets a book from his locker when Muffy approaches him wearing a monocle.

Muffy: The monocle, so old it's new.

Her vision is contorted.

Arthur rolls his eyes, shakes his head and walks away. Muffy turns and runs into Prunella’s open locker door.

Muffy: Oh… Oh.

Prunella closes the door. Muffy rubs her head.

***

Muffy sits on her bed, holding an ice pack to her head and watching Capri di Vapida’s show. Candy Coco and Capri walk down a street.

Candy Coco (on TV): So, Capri, how do you get your ideas for the next big trend?

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Lots of things inspire me. Like, I might look at this tree and think, you know, is that tree warm?

Candy Coco (on TV): Is it?

Capri feels the tree.

Capri di Vapida (on TV): No, it's barky. Actually, I get a lot of ideas from Pixel.

Pixel licks at an ice-cream cone on the ground. When he looks up, the cone sticks on his nose.

Pixel (on TV): (whimpers)

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Ah. Nose cones, now that could be warm. You have to look around with, like, you know, your eyes.

Muffy nods.

Muffy sits on a bench on the playground wearing her designs. She sees George on a seesaw.

Muffy: Hmm, designer antlers.

She sees herself wearing fake green antlers.

Binky: Why are you drawing George? Draw me!

Muffy: (gasps) What are you wearing?!

Binky stands in front of her wearing a hat like Sue Ellen’s.

Binky: What, this? Lots of kids are wearing them.

Muffy puts on her monocle. She sees Arthur and Buster reading, Fern jumping rope, and Mr. Morris sweeping the floor. All are wearing ski hats.

Muffy: (gasps)

In Muffy’s imagination, Sue Ellen sits in a gondola with a parrot. They are wearing ski hats, but are otherwise dressed like Capri di Vapida.

Coco Candy: I'm here with Sue Ellen, creator of the ever-popular ear-flap hat fad. What's your secret to your pitch-perfect fashion sense?

Sue Ellen: I just, like, you know, wear what I like, like.

Parrot: (squawks)

Muffy: But… it's not fair!

Binky: Relax, you can get one at Care To Wear. But you'd better act quick, ‘cause they're selling like hotcakes.

Muffy stands up and angrily walks over to Sue Ellen who is eating a cup of yoghurt.

Muffy: You're not supposed to be the trend-setter, I am! Can't you just stick to being a world-travelling do-gooder?!

She walks past Sue Ellen in a huff.

***

Sue Ellen’s doorbell rings. She opens to Muffy who is wearing grey sweats and holding a blue ski hat which she puts on. She has rings under her eyes.

Muffy: There, now I have one too. But it's cashmere, so it's better.

Sue Ellen: Muffy, you look terrible, come inside. Do you want a smoothie?

Muffy nods.

***

Muffy sits at the kitchen table while Sue Ellen operates a mixer. She pours two glasses.

Sue Ellen: I don't think I've ever seen you in sweats before. I mean, outside gym class.

Muffy: I've given up on fashion.

Sue Ellen: Why?

Muffy: Because I'll never create something really popular. I just don't have "it".

Sue Ellen: What's "it"?

Muffy: You know, a unique style everyone wants to copy. No one ever copied me when I wore that hat.

Sue Ellen: Well, you only wore it once. I remember the day. I think I even have a picture of it.

She gets her journal out of her backpack. There is a photo of Muffy standing beside a snowman wearing the ski hat. Muffy reads the caption.

Muffy: "Muffy looking fabulous. I should Muffy it up sometimes." Muffy it up?

Sue Ellen: It's an expression I made up. It just means to make something simple a little bit fancier. You're not offended, are you?

Muffy: Are you kidding? I'm thrilled! I may not have created a fad, but I've become a verb. That is so warm!

Sue Ellen: Warm?

Muffy drains her smoothie.

Muffy: (sighs) I feel one hundred percent better. By the way, that blue looks fabulous on you, you should wear it more often.

Sue Ellen looks at her blue journal. Muffy leaves

***

Capri di Vapida and Pixel are sitting in a gondola wearing nose cones. Capri is eating dog biscuits.

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Dog biscuits are very warm. But they should make them in different flavors like yellow.

Candy Coco (on TV): Em, yellow isn't a flavor, it's a color.

Capri di Vapida (on TV): Are you sure? Cause this tastes really yellow to me.

Muffy is lying in bed. She turns off the TV and hands Bailey the remote control.

Muffy: Okay, I don't care how warm it is, I am not eating dog biscuits!

Bailey: I applaud your decision, Miss Muffy.

Muffy: Ooh, love the touch of red, Bailey.

A red handkerchief is sticking out of Bailey’s jacket pocket.

Bailey: Just trying to Muffy it up a bit. Good night.

He turns off the light and leaves.

Muffy: (sighs)

She looks delighted.