Arthur's Baby (episode)/Transcript

(The episode starts as Arthur and his family are celebrating their baby Kate's first birthday celebration.)

• Arthur's Mom: Happy first birthday, Kate!
• Arthur and D.W.: Happy birthday, Kate!

(Kate starts giggling and she puts the cake into her mouth. Everyone gasps; Arthur now explains what babies do.)

• Arthur: Babies do some dopey things, but I guess we were all babies once, like my friend Buster.

(The timeline changes back to when Buster Baxter, himself, was a baby.)

• Buster's Mom: No sweetie, don't do that! Oh, goodness! No! Stop!!
• Arthur (V.O.): And Mr. Ratburn.

(Now it changes straight when Arthur's teacher was a little baby.)

• Ratburn's Mom: Emil, what are you doing?!!
• Arthur (V.O.): Even my mom and dad.

(And now we go back to when Arthur's parents were babies, just before Arthur and his sister, D.W. were born.)

• Arthur's Mom: Clean your room!!

(We return to the present, where Arthur, as before, is celebrating Kate's first birthday with his family.)

• Arthur: Even my mom and dad. I already missed the days when she was a cute, little baby.
• D.W.: No, you don't!
• Arthur: Do, too!
• D.W.: You didn't even like Kate when she was a little baby!
• Arthur: Did, too!
• D.W.: Uh-huh, sure. I remember exactly what happened...
• [INTERTITLE SHOWS]

(Arthur and D.W. are having a grape-eating contest, to see which one will eat the last grape.)

• Arthur: Let go, D.W.!
• D.W.: No, you let go!
• Arthur: You already ate more than me!
• D.W.: I needed more than you. You're only bigger than me because you're full of so much food!

(The last grape lands into D.W.'s mouth, which makes Arthur so furious that he wishes to remove all the little sisters.)

• Arthur: You know how the world could be perfect? Remove all little sisters! That's my idea perfect.
• D.W.: Delicious!

(Now, Arthur and D.W. have been told by their dad to come over to them because he and their mother have a surprise.)

• Arthur's Dad: Arthur! D.W.! We have a surprise for you.
• Arthur: Is it a new bicycle?
• Arthur's Mom: No!
• D.W.: Is Arthur moving out?
• Arthur's Mom: No!
• Arthur & D.W.: What is it? What is it?
• Arthur's Mom: We're going to have a baby!
• D.W.: A baby!
• Arthur: A baby?
• D.W. (V.O.): A baby, yahoo! Baby baby baby baby, yeah, baby!
• Arthur's Dad: It will be about six months before the baby comes. Plenty of time to get ready.

(At the gym, Binky and Arthur are fighting, but Arthur loses and Binky tells him to get some earplugs.)

• Binky: You better buy some earplugs. Babies never stop crying!

(Binky begins to laugh, and the imagination scene fades in, where an unknown-named baby is crying really loud. This happened when Arthur tells his mom to pass the salt, but was no good.)

• Arthur: Pass the salt, please.
• Arthur's Mom: What?
• Arthur: I said, pass the salt, please!

(Now, a firetruck flies through our screen, and while the baby is still crying, the firefighters cover their ears because they don't like the sound, and it fades back to Binky back at the gym.)

• Binky: So you can forget about sleeping!

(Everyone laughs, including Binky, which this embarrasses Arthur. While this is happening, 

• Muffy: Poor Arthur. In a few months, he'll be changing all those dirty diapers!

(Muffy now jumps in the pool, causing the screen to be splashed by water effects, where it fades to where Buster is pretending that Arthur gets protected by the baby's dirty diapers.)

• Buster: This should protect you from those smelly diapers!
• Arthur (muffled): Yea, I can't smell anything!
• Buster: Great!
• Arthur (muffled): But I can't breathe! *gasps*
• Buster: *gasps* Whoa!! *loud crash*

(Buster tries to pull the shoe off of Arthur's mouth, and as this happens,  Arthur gasps for breath and Buster crashes through some of Arthur's parents' things. At the mall, Arthur and Buster see some babies in strollers, which gets him confused.)

• Arthur: What's the big deal with babies? They don't even do anything!
• Buster: Well, maybe you can teach your baby to do something useful, like earn money for you.

(In Arthur's imagination, he pretends he is a magician and he presents an amazing baby.)

• Arthur: Presenting the amazing baby!

(The audience is thrilled by the amazing baby, and they give their money to Arthur the magician.)

• Arthur: Thank you! Thank you.

(In the second imagination, Arthur pretends he has a smart baby who does his homework for him.)

• Buster (V.O.): Or do your homework.
• Arthur: And when you're done with the math, don't forget to write my report on Magellan!

​(Now Arthur and Buster are in the treehouse while the imagination fades out.)

• Arthur: *sighs* If only life were like that.
• Buster (V.O.): Pretty soon, you can forget about playing after-school; you'll have to baby-sit! *laughs*
• Francine: And you'll start talking baby-talk all the time!

(Arthur and his friends are playing foot-ball and he trips to other side of the team and falls.)

• Coach: Great catch, Read! You okay?
• Arthur (in baby-talk): Got an ouchy boo-boo!

(Everyone in the foot-ball team, including their coach, starts laughing out loud.)

• Francine: