Bugged/Transcript

BUGGED

Written by: Jonathan Greenberg—Storyboard by: Robert Yap

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Arthur images how other people see him. To his mother he looks like a baby.

Mrs. Read: Sorry. I just can't help thinking of you as my little baby

Arthur: Well, I'm not a baby, OK? I'm a...   He suddenly wears a tuxedo.    …a waiter?

Pal is holding his empty dog dish in his mouth.

Pal: (whines)

Arthur: Our special today is kibble drenched in steak gravy with a side of liver snaps.

Pal: Woof! Woof!

Arthur: How would you like that done?

Pal: Woof!

Arthur: Pal is a very demanding customer, but he is a good tipper.    Pal drops a bone at his feet.

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On the “Bionic Bunny Show” Dr. Fowl has tied Bionic Bunny to a strange machine.

Dr. Fowl: When the sand drains from the hourglass, the conveyor belt will carry you onto the bed of this catapult where rats will gnaw the rope on this pulley, releasing the weight and sending you into this vat of piping-hot scrambled eggs!  (laughs madly)

Bionic Bunny: You'll never get away with this, Dr Fowl!    Binky looks horrified. Brain beside him looks bored.

Brain: Why doesn't he just THROW Bionic Bunny into the scrambled eggs?

Binky: Hey, whose side are you on?

Brain: But it's so unrealistic! Watch now. Dr Fowl will reveal his master plan for no reason.

Dr. Fowl: While you're melting like a wedge of cheddar, I'll be robbing banks dressed as… YOU!   He puts on a Bionic Bunny mask.

Brain: Ah, the age-old mask device?! We've seen it a million times. I can tell you exactly what's going to happen next.

Binky: Cut it out! Why do you have to ruin the whole show?! It really bugs me.

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Mrs. Powers tucks her son in.

Brain: Mom? Am I annoying?

Mrs. Powers: Of course not, Sweetie. Where does a question like that come from?

Brain: It was just something someone said. But you know, you really shouldn’t end a sentence with a proposition. “From where does a question like that come” is more correct.

Mrs. Powers: Okay, Alan. It’s time to go to sleep.

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I must've stayed up too late working on those extra credit problems.

Alan Powers: Mom, don't be alarmed when you see me!

Brain's Mom: You look fine. Now hurry along.

The Brain: Mom, I'm a bug!

Brain's Mom: Of course, Alan, you're a common household pest. Now put on the sweater from Grandma. It's school picture day.

(At school)

The Brain: I'm sorry I'm late, Mr. Rat—

Nigel Ratburn: Oh, just take a seat and stop bugging us.

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Brain the bug wants to enter the cafeteria.

Mr. Haney: I'm sorry, Alan. You can't come in here. We have orders from the Board of Health.

Brain: But I'm hungry!

Mr. Haney: Well, take it up with the Board. In the meantime, there's plenty of rotten fruit in the garbage.

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Brain the bug hides from the others in a cave.

Binky: The subterranean cave? Not THAT age-old device

Francine: Brain, have you learnt nothing from the Battle of Agincourt?

Brain: What… what are you going to do to me?   

The kids grab him and put him in a machine like on the Bionic Bunny Show. They are now dressed like Dr. Fowl.

Binky: When Buster pulls this lever, this belt thingy will carry you onto this throwing thingy which will toss you onto this wall where you will be swatted by this giant fly-swatter.

Brain: But... but that makes no sense. It would be much simpler just to swat me without all the rigamarole.

Binky: Maybe. But it would be a lot less fun. Haha! OK, Buster, let her rip!  (laughs)

Brain: Nooo!

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Brain consults Prunella (as a fortune-teller) about his dream.

Brain: So what does it all mean?

Prunella: Ohhhmmm... I've got it! It means you will come into sudden wealth.

Brain: Sudden wealth?? There was nothing in my dream about sudden wealth!

Prunella: No, wait! You will meet a stranger who will change your life.

Brain: What has that to do with bugs?!      Prunella consults a book.

Prunella: Uh...you will receive a promotion at work?

Brain: I don't have a job! Admit it, you don't know what you're talking about!

Prunella: I suppose that's possible.

Brain: I think I dreamed I was a bug because I AM a bug... in a symbolic sense. You see, when I correct people they find it bothersome.

Prunella: Okay, smarty-pants, have it YOUR way!

Brain: A perfect illustration of my theory. I see only one solution - a vow of total silence.

Prunella: Total silence?! Ha! You won't last a minute!

Brain: I assure you, Prunella, I have ample willpower to... Oops.  

Prunella grins. He makes a lock lips and throw away the key gesture.

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Brain has broken his vow of silence in order to win “Capture the Flag”.

Brain: Here. Sorry.

Francine: Sorry? What are you sorry for? You got us the flag.

Arthur: Yeah, that was great.

Brain: But I told you guys what to do. Doesn’t that annoy you?

Buster: Yeah, but not when it wins us the game.

Arthur: Is that why you’ve been so quiet today? Because you think you’re annoying?

Brain: Well, I overheard Francine calling me a pest the other day.

Francine: I was just mad that we lost, Brain. I’m sorry.

Arthur: Besides, everyone bugs people sometimes. Muffy’s a show-off, Binky can be a bully, and Buster eats my desserts when I’m not looking…

Buster: Huh? And what about Francine, she can be a real bigmouth.

Francine: What?! Who are you calling a bigmouth?!

Brain: I guess you’re right.

Francine: I am not a bigmouth!!    The others leave while she yells.

The next morning Francine wakes up with a pelican’s bill.

Francine:  Hh!  (screams)