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[Upbeat Music Playing]


*Narrator: Who is candy canes and Mary Janes? That Miss Muffy. Fresh baguettes and big barrettes, that Miss Muffy. She's dainty lace on a dress. She's frilly… funny… fancy finesse! Who is Valentines and hair that shines? That Miss Muffy. Silver skates and candied dates, That Miss Muffy. She’s peachy icing on a bundt cake! Oh, we love her so, see her now look out, world, Holy cow! Hold on tight if you thought you were so sweet, Because Miss Muffy, That Miss Muffy’s got you beat! [splash!]
[Lively Music Playing]
 
Narrator: Who is candy canes and Mary Janes? That Miss Muffy! Fresh baguettes and big barrettes, that Miss Muffy! She's dainty lace on a dress. She's frilly… funny… fancy finesse! Who is Valentines and hair that shines? That Miss Muffy! Silver skates and candied dates, That Miss Muffy! She’s peachy icing on a bundt cake! Oh, we love her so, see her now look out, world! Holy cow! Hold on tight if you thought you were so sweet, Because Miss Muffy, That Miss Muffy’s got you beat!


<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy Goes Metropolitan</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy Goes Metropolitan</p>


<p style="text-align: center;">Written by [[Matthew Lane]] - Storyboard by [[Jeremy O'Neill]]</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Written by [[Matthew Lane]] ------------- Storyboard by [[Jeremy O'Neil]]</p>


<p style="text-align: center;">Lakewood Cafeteria</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Lakewood Cafeteria</p>
*Buster: I figured out what happiness is!
*Buster: I figured out what happiness is!
*Francine: Yeah. What is it?
*Francine: Yeah. What is it?
Line 25: Line 24:
*Buster: I was in a pie eating contest at the Mayor's house.
*Buster: I was in a pie eating contest at the Mayor's house.
*Sue Ellen: How about you Muffy?
*Sue Ellen: How about you Muffy?
*Muffy: Uhhh sure. Don't be silly. I've been to Europe and to the Caribbean and to Crown City lots of times.
*Muffy: Uhhh sure. Don't be silly. I've been to Europe and to the Carribean and to Crown City lots of times.
*[bell rings]
*[bell rings]
<p style="text-align: center;">In the Lakewood art classroom</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">In the Lakewood art classroom</p>
*Muffy: [whistling Crown City song]
*Muffy: [whistling Crown City song]
*[Sue Ellen is washing her hands]
*[Sue Ellen is washing her hands]
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*Muffy: Well, I have. Just not recently. Yes, it's been so long it just feels like I've never been. Oh, I would just love to return to be beautiful Crown City by the sea.
*Muffy: Well, I have. Just not recently. Yes, it's been so long it just feels like I've never been. Oh, I would just love to return to be beautiful Crown City by the sea.
*Sue Ellen: My dad did say I could bring a friend..
*Sue Ellen: My dad did say I could bring a friend..
*Muffy: Fantastic! Oh, we'll have such fun. There's stores, and restaurants, horse-drawn carriages, and room service, and vallet parking, gingerell with maraschino cherries..
*Muffy: Fantastic! Oh, we'll have such fun. There's stores, and restaurants, horse drawn carriages, and room service, and vallet parking, gingerell with maraschino cherries..
*Sue Ellen: It's not gonna be like that..
*Sue Ellen: It's not gonna be like that..
<p style="text-align: center;">Crosswires' Mansion</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Crosswires' Mansion</p>
*Mr. Armstrong: You did tell her this was just a three day trip, right?
*Mr. Armstrong: You did tell her this was just a three day trip, right?
*Sue Ellen: I thought so...
*Sue Ellen: I thought so...
*Muffy: As you can see, I've made a fabulous list for the trip. We'll start with a fancy dinner, next comes a shopping spree, and then onto a tasteful cultural event. Perhaps an art exhibit, or the opera.
*Muffy: As you can see, I've made a fabulous list for the trip. We'll start with a fancy dinner, next comes a shopping spree, and then onto a tasteful cultural event. Perhaps an art exhibit, or the opera.
<p style="text-align: center;">On the way to Crown City</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">On the way to Crown City</p>
*Muffy: [singing] Crown City! One heck of a diamond by the seaaaaaaaaaa! Crown City you're dynamite you're peaches and cream
*Muffy: [singing] Crown City! One heck of a diamond by the seaaaaaaaaaa! Crown City you're dynamite you're peaches and cream
*Sue Ellen: Hey Muffy look, we're heading into the city now!
*Sue Ellen: Hey Muffy look, we're heading into the city now!
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*Mr. Armstrong: Not exactly.
*Mr. Armstrong: Not exactly.
<p style="text-align: center;">Sue Ellen and Muffy get out of the car</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Sue Ellen and Muffy get out of the car</p>
*Muffy: Was that woman by the fire hydrant selling soap?
*Muffy: Was that woman by the fire hydrant selling soap?
*Carla: Yes, she was. And she makes a wonderful ginger oatmeal and seaweed bar that's great for exfoliating.
*Carla: Yes, she was. And she makes a wonderful ?????? and seaweed ?????? great for exfoliating.
*Muffy: Nothing but camille and verdina touch my skin.
*Muffy: Nothing that the Academy in ???????? touch my skin.
*Carla: [shaking hands with Muffy] You must be Mifi.
*Carla: [shaking hands with Muffy] You must be Mifi.
*Muffy: It's Muffy...
*Muffy: It's Muffy...
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*Muffy: I hear the International Fusion Cuisine in Crown City is magnificent. Perhaps we should try-
*Muffy: I hear the International Fusion Cuisine in Crown City is magnificent. Perhaps we should try-
*Mr. Armstrong: How about that cool little Ethiopian place by the firehouse? What's it called?
*Mr. Armstrong: How about that cool little Ethiopian place by the firehouse? What's it called?
*Sue Ellen: Abbis Ababa. Let's go!
*Sue Ellen: Abbis ababa. Let's go!
<p style="text-align: center;">Addis Ababa</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Addis Ababa</p>
*[everybody is eating with their hands]
*[everybody is eating with their hands]
*Muffy: Are you sure they don't have silverware here?
*Muffy: Are you sure they don't have silverware here?
*Mr. Armstrong: Nope. Just these. [shows hands] Isn't it fun?
*Mr. Armstrong: Nope. Just these. [shows hands] Isn't it fun?
*Muffy: But.. where are the different waiters? There's supposed to be one to sweep up the crumbs, one to unfold the napkins, one to- 
*Muffy: But.. where are the different waiters? There's supposed to be one to sweep up the crumbs, one to unfold the napkins, one to-
*[The waiter they previously had places more bread tortillas on the table making Muffy gasp]
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
*Sue Ellen: Sorry dinner was a let-down Muffy.
*Sue Ellen: Sorry dinner was a let-down Muffy.
*Muffy: Well, tonight may have been a flop, but tomorrow's going to be glorious..
*Muffy: Well, tonight may have been a flop, but tomorrow's going to be glorious..
<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy's Daydream</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy's Daydream</p>
*Everybody: It's Crosswire!
*Everybody: It's Crosswire!
*Guy: THE Muffy Crosswire?
*Guy: THE Muffy Crosswire?
Line 88: Line 72:
*Cashier: You must spend more!
*Cashier: You must spend more!
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
*Sue Ellen: Don't worry. You're gonna love the shopping we're gonna do tomorrow.
*Sue Ellen: Don't worry. You're gonna love the shopping we're gonna do tomorrow.
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City</p>
*[At a fish stand]
*[At a fish stand]
*Muffy: This wasn't what I- [fish almosts hits her] Ahh!
*Muffy: This wasn't what I- [fish almosts hits her] Ahh!
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*Carla: I promise we'll stop at a botique or two. As soon as I find a good ripe turban squash.
*Carla: I promise we'll stop at a botique or two. As soon as I find a good ripe turban squash.
<p style="text-align: center;">Little Lady Dollar Mart</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Little Lady Dollar Mart</p>
 
*Muffy: What do you mean nothing costs more then a dollar? Plastic earings? Plastic may be alright for the cap on a bottle of diet soda, but on my ears? Honestly!
 
*Muffy: What do you mean nothing costs more than a dollar? Plastic earings? Plastic may be alright for the cap on a bottle of diet soda, but on my ears? Honestly!
*Sue Ellen: Muffy! I found some squeezable glitter paints for decorating jeans and shirts.
*Sue Ellen: Muffy! I found some squeezable glitter paints for decorating jeans and shirts.
*Carla: [shows a cowskin beret] Ah Muffy now this, this is you. It's very chique.
*Carla: Ah Muffy now this, this is you. It's very chique.
*Muffy: Cow is not my color and fake fur is way passé. Hm.
*Muffy: Cow is not my color and fake fur is way passay. Hm.
*Carla: Well, suit yourself.
*Carla: Well, suit yourself.
*Muffy: Mhmmm...
*Muffy: Mhmmm...
<p style="text-align: center;">Hot Dog Stand</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Hot Dog Stand</p>
*Sue Ellen: One foot long, extra sauerkraut, hold the relish.
*Sue Ellen: One foot long, extra sauerkraut, hold the relish.
*Muffy: [talking to Carla] So will we be dabbling in high culture tonight?
*Muffy: [talking to Carla] So will we be dabbling in high culture tonight?
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*Muffy: The Renae's? Ooh, it sounds French.
*Muffy: The Renae's? Ooh, it sounds French.
*Sue Ellen: Quick Muffy, what do you want?
*Sue Ellen: Quick Muffy, what do you want?
*Muffy: [ordering] Uhhh.. Poulet au beurre noir... hold the beurre noir
*Muffy: [ordering] Uhhh.. Poulet ??????????... hold the ??????????
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
*Muffy: An evening at Renae's... I imagine Renae's as anyone who's anyone goes.
*Muffy: An evening at Renae's... I imagine Renae's as anyone who's anyone goes.
<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy's Fantasy</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Muffy's Fantasy</p>
 
*Muffy: Yes, it captures my angst. But this one's my favorite. It's an Andy Warthog.
<p style="text-align: center;">
</p>
 
 
*[Muffy imagine's Ranae's as a popular art gallery]
*Muffy: [looking at paintings of herself] Yes, it captures my angst. But this one's my favorite. It's an Andy Warthog.
*Andy Warthog: I'm so glad you like it M.
*Andy Warthog: I'm so glad you like it M.
*Muffy: I do. I really really do. No offense, Keith.
*Muffy: I do. I really really do. No offense, T.
*[Warthog shows Muffy a cracker on a plate.]
*[Warthog shows Muffy a cracker on a plate.]
*Andy Warthog: What do you think of my latest piece?
*Andy Warthog: What do you think of my latest piece?
Line 138: Line 106:
*Andy Warthog: Broken cracker on a plate.
*Andy Warthog: Broken cracker on a plate.
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Carla's apartment</p>
*Carla: Girls, are you ready? Renae's awaits.
*Carla: Girls, are you ready? Renae's awaits.
<p style="text-align: center;">Renae's</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Renae's</p>
*[Renae's turns out to be a poetry club. A rather dirty one, also.]
*[Renae's turns out to be a poetry club. A rather dirty one, also.]
*Poetry Narrator: So let's take a riboflavin ride on a chartreuse kaboose..
*Poetry Narrator: So let's take a riboflavin ride on a {{Spelling}} kaboose..
*Muffy: What's going on?
*Muffy: What's going on?
*Sue Ellen: [whispering] It's a poetry slam.
*Sue Ellen: [whispering] It's a poetry slam.
Line 153: Line 117:
*Sue Ellen: Oh look! There's a table.
*Sue Ellen: Oh look! There's a table.
*Muffy: [gasp] Eww! Gross! Gum!
*Muffy: [gasp] Eww! Gross! Gum!
*Muffy: I can't take it any longer! Look at my dress. The skirt is ruined! Look at my hair. The ends are split. Where am I? No ritz, no glitz, no silverware, big, wet, fish fly past my face! It's all wrong! Crown City you're NOT dynamite, you're NOT peaches and cream, I just wanna go home!
*Muffy: I can't take it any longer! Look at my dress. The skirt is ruined! Look at my hair. The ends are split. Where am I? No ritz{{Spelling}}, no glitz, no silverware, big, wet, fish fly past my face! It's all wrong! Crown City you're NOT dynamite, you're NOT peaches and cream, I just wanna go home!
*[Everybody claps]
*[Everybody claps]
<p style="text-align: center;">The Streets of Crown City</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">The Streets of Crown City</p>
*Muffy: It's tragic! It's racchid! I am undone..
*Muffy: It's tragic! It's racchid! I am undone..
*[As Muffy walks over a grate, her shoe slips off]
*Sue Ellen: Muffy your-
*Sue Ellen: Muffy your-
*Muffy: No. Leave it. I'll hop. You do realize if I was not so weak I would absolutely refuse to go down here.
*Muffy: No. Leave it. I'll hop. You do realize if I was not so weak I would absolutely refuse to go down here.
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City Subway</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City Subway</p>
*[Saxophone Playing Jazzy Tune]
*[Saxophone Playing Jazzy Tune]
*Muffy: This is the subway?
*Muffy: This is the subway?
Line 188: Line 147:
*[Puts on the fake cowskin hat]
*[Puts on the fake cowskin hat]
*Muffy: Is it me?
*Muffy: Is it me?
*Sue Ellen and Carla: Definitely.
*Sue Ellen and Carla: Definately.
*Muffy: And now I shall buy the fattest most doughey pretzel Crown City has to offer. With extra cheese of course. Won't you join me?
*Muffy: And now I shall buy the fattest most doughey pretzel Crown City has to offer. With extra cheese of course. Won't you join me?
*[Music Playing]
*[Music Playing]
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Crown City</p>
*Crown City, you're dynamite, you're peaches and cream! Try your luck, fair kid, Crown City!
*Crown City, you're dynamite, you're peaches and cream! Try your luck, fair kid, Crown City!
*Everybody: Crown City! One heck of a diamond by the seaaaaa!
*Everybody: Crown City! One heck of a diamond by the seaaaaa!
<p style="text-align: left;">\</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">{{HeadingA|Transcribed by [[User:LukePhiladelphia|LukePhiladelphia]].}}</p>
[[Category:Transcripts]]
[[Category:Transcripts]]
[[Category:A to Z]]
[[Category:Season 7 transcripts]]

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