The Curse of the Grebes/Transcript

Introduction
In Ancient Greece Sisiphus is pushing a boulder up a hill.

Sisyphus: (gruns, groans)      Arthur stands in front of the hill.

Arthur: This is Sisyphus, a character from Greek mythology. The Greek gods must not have liked him very much... Sisyphus reaches the top of the hill.

Sisyphus: Made it. Phew! ''The boulder rolls down again. Sisyphus runs after it''   Oh, no! Not again!

Arthur: He had to spend eternity pushing that boulder up a hill, only to have it roll back down over and over again! On another hill Buster is pushing up a huge baseball.    If Sisyphus had liked baseball, he would have been an Elwood City Grebes fan. Getting your hopes up year after year…   Buster reaches the top.

Buster: This time, we're gonna win. This time, it's gonna be different. Go Grebes!

Arthur:...only to have those hopes crushed at the end of every season. ''The ball starts moving. Buster tries to stop it, then he runs down the hill with the ball rolling after him.''

Title Card: Buster Roars (Chicken)
''Arthur and Buster are throwing a baseball to each other in the Reads’ yard. Pal runs from one to the other.''

Buster: You're acting like it's no big deal, but the Grebes are in the world championship.

Arthur: I just don't want to jinx it by getting my hopes up. That’s all.

Buster: We already won the first game. We just need to win three more.

Arthur: But we're up against the Crown City Kings. They've won the world championship twenty-five times. Buster ignores the ball as it flies past him.

Buster: So what?

Arthur: So the Grebes haven't won a world championship since 1918. Pal fetches the ball.

Buster: But don't you see? Our time has come.

Arthur: How can you be so sure?

#
Brain, Arthur and Buster climb up to the treehouse.

Brain: Baseball is a science, a game of numbers. This year we've got three factors that have changed the equation.

Arthur: What factors? ''The treehouse is full of Grebes fan articles. Brain points to some pictures.''

Brain: The new players: Winlin, Playmon and Batería. He gets out a folder.    Last year, Playmon hit .375 with a .465 on-base percentage.

Buster: The Kings don't have a hitter like that. Arthur looks at Brain’s chart.

Arthur: Yeah, and Batería is the best short stop in the league.

Brain: Not to mention Winlin, the best pitcher with 27 saves and a 2.1 E.R.A.

Buster: Buster: Nobody can outpitch him

Brain: I've done a data comparison of the Kings and the Grebes and mapped it all onto this simple grid. The outcome is clear. Our team simply can't be beat. Arthur and Buster smile.

#
''Arthur, Buster, Brain and Francine are sitting in the Sugar Bowl. Francine is wearing a Grebe fan hat.''

Francine: I figured out that this hat wards off the curse. Every time I wear it, the Grebes win!

Brain: There's no such thing as "the curse".

Francine: How can you say that? Things haven't been the same for the Grebes since that one game in 1918... It was the Grebes versus Kings…

''Flashback: The Grebes stadium in 1918. ''

Stadium Announcer: It's two on and two out for the Grebes with Ray “Woodpecker” Vance stepping up to the plate. Elwood City has their pennant hopes riding high on Vance. And he connects…  Vance hits the ball.   This could be it. This ball is going! Going...! Gone! The Grebes win ten to nine! They are the new wooorld champions!

''Three boys are standing on a roof overlooking the stadium. The ball falls into the gutter of the building and rolls down the drainpipe. A boy climbs down the ladder, runs around the house and catches the ball as it comes out of the pipe.''

The Kid: Got it! A richly dressed man is standing behind him.

Mr. Crane: Ahem! I bet you're one of those urchins who sneaks into the park without paying! Give me that ball, you little thief!

The Kid: But, Mister, I chased it down fair and square.

Mr. Crane: My name is Horace P. Crane. I own the Grebes, I own the land you're standing on, and I own that ball. The boy spits on the ball before handing it to Crane.

The Kid: Then with this ball I put a curse on your crummy team! You’ll never win another championship!

The fantasy ends.

Francine: And that started the longest championship-losing streak of any team in the history of the league.   Mr. Manino brings their orders.

Buster: Harry told me the curse of the kid was lifted this year.

Arthur: Really? How?

Buster: A descendant of Horace P Crane, his second cousin's nephew's niece, found the ball in her attic and finally laid it at the kid's tombstone.

Brain: Why do people believe these things?

Francine: Well, so far so good. But I'm not taking off this hat until the series is over.

#
Muffy has shown Francine her dad's “Go Grebes”-commercial.

Francine: That is so hypocritical! You and your dad have always been Kings fans.

Muffy: Yeah, but now the Grebes have three wins. It's much more fun to be on the winning side

Francine: Anyone can root for a winning team. It takes character to stick with the underdogs.

#
In Buster's fantasy, everybody blames him for bringing bad luck.

Brain: You've done enough damage!

Buster: What are you doing here?? You don't even believe in the curse.

Brain: Of course not. But according to the quantum theory, the outcome of any experiment is partly determined by the presence of a particular observer.

Buster: What does that have to do with baseball?

Brain: Your very presence in the stands has a negative effect on the physics of baseball for the Grebes.

Playmon: In other words: you're the curse.

Buster: Nooo!

#
While picking out a milk carton Buster notices Grebes player Playmon standing beside him.

Buster: Oh! Playmon?

Playmon: Hey, kid.

Buster: Wow! This is...! I'm a big fan.

Playmon: Nice to meet you.

Buster: Would you sign my milk carton?

Playmon: Sure. What's your name?

Buster: Buster Baxter. Winlin and Batería join Playmon.

Winlin: Hey, Playmon, there's a special on apples.

Buster: Winlin?! Batería! You guys buy groceries too?

Playmon: This is Buster. How about signing this for him? He hands the carton to Winlin.

Winlin: We really appreciate your support. We couldn't do it without fans like you.

Batería: You going to the big game?

Buster: Yes. I mean no. Trust me, you don't want me there.

Batería: Why not?

Buster: You know how you lost games two, five and six? It was my fault.

Winlin: Guess we're off the hook.

Buster: No, it's true. When I'm in the stands, you lose. When I'm not, you win. It's the curse. I bring the curse.

''He walks away. The three players follow him.''

Batería: No es verdad. It's not true.

Playmon: The curse is you not showing up for the game because you're afraid we lose.

Winlin: The curse is you thinking that we don't need you in the stands tomorrow because the fact is we do. Ever hear of Dickinson?

Buster: Shortstop?

Winlin: Poet. Lived in New England. Wrote a poem that goes like this. “Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul / and sings the tune without the words and never stops at all.“

Playmon: Do you see what we're trying to say?

Buster: Not really.

Winlin: Tomorrow at the big game, hope is a green-tailed grebe. If we're gonna win...

Playmon: ...then we need all the fan support we can get.

Batería: We need you, Buster, curse or no curse.

Winlin: Yeah, Buster, we need you.