Desert Island Dish/Transcript

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Buster: This wasn't easy, but afterthinking about it a lot, and I mean a lot, I finally decided on ice-cream

Class: (murmur assent)

Mr. Ratburn: You did choose a dairy product, so you'd be getting calcium but not enough vitamins, fibre or protein. Buster walks back to his seat.

Buster: I knew it. I should have gone with marshmallows.

Mr. Ratburn: Francine, how about you? Francine stands up.

Francine: I would bring an unlimited supply of barbecue potato chips.

A fantasy shows her eating chips on a desert island.

Mr. Ratburn: Mmm, let's think about all those spicy, powdery, very very salty potato chips.

Francine: (coughs) Need water. Arthur is nearby munching cereal.

Mr. Ratburn: And you, Arthur? How long can anyone survive on sugar and yellow dye number five? ''The fantasy ends. '' True, you'd be getting carbohydrates but with far too much refined sugar and far too little protein. Anyone else? Alan, what did you come up with? ''Brain looks at a sheet of paper. '' Alan?

Brain: Er... I don't have the answer.

Class: (gasp)

Mr. Ratburn: Well, at the moment nobody does. None of you would have survived for very long on the island.

Buster: What if I switched to jelly beans?

Mr. Ratburn: Your food choices have to sustain you. Help could be a long time in coming.

Arthur: I think I like the pop quizzes better.

Mr. Ratburn: I want you all to try the assignment again.

Class: (groan)

Brain: Another chance?

Mr. Ratburn: Remember, each of you may bring only one food, but your overall goal is to survive for as long as you can. You have the weekend to come up with a solution.

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''Francine, Arthur, Buster and Brain have placed an assortment of food on a table in front of the class. They also have a flipchart with the food pyramid.''

Francine: While each of could survive for some time on a single food from one of the food groups...

Brain: ...research led us to the undeniable conclusion that it would be impossible to survive for very long without combining our food choices.

Mr. Ratburn: So you decided to form a group.

Arthur: Otherwise, it's impossible.

Mr. Ratburn: I never directed you to work together.

Brain: But you never said we couldn't. So Arthur brought something from the protein group.

Arthur: Hard-boiled eggs.

Francine: But we also needed vegetables so I brought a salad. With olive oil.

Brain: Which takes care of our fat. And I brought fruit.

Buster: And I brought some bread rolls and cheese, and lots of water to wash it down.

Brain: So that takes care of our dairy and grains. The assignment said that the overall goal was to survive.

Buster: And you just can't make it on only one kind of food.

Francine: You have to have grains, fruits and vegetables, dairy, protein and healthy fats.

Mr. Ratburn: Well done! You've made a perfect presentation. You figured out that you need a selection from each of the major food groups. ''The kids smile at each other. Brain and Francine high five. ''Well... almost perfect. You forgot one thing. He walks out of the class.

Brain: I knew we forgot something!

Buster: Oh. Does this mean we failed?  Mr. Ratburns brings in a trolley.

Mr. Ratburn: A desert island dessert. ''He reveals a desert island shaped cake. '' There's nothing wrong with a desert island treat now and then. After this, I've challenged Mrs. Sweetwater's class to a game of „Capture The Flag“. Eat up!

Class: (cheer)